spadesslick:

pimposaur:

reasons not to kill yourself

• chicken tender
• the billionth number of pi is 9
• it’s not gay if it’s on the moon
• sponges feel cool
• highdeas.com
• joe biden
• the letter Q
• dirt

Some of these are legitimately calming.

pippa6100:

I can’t believe Doug Dimmadome, owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome, bought tumblr

noonereadstheurl:

I honestly can’t blame David Karp for wanting to sell this website

You can only be called “daddy” by white middle-class teenaged girls so many times before something just snaps

lusture:

lusture:

omg I’m at work and a group of like 13 year old girls come in and order their lattes or whatever and one girl is like can you Instagram this with all our names on it? and her friend is like ya totally and so I may have put a q in the middle of all of their names so they got their coffee and were like “omg what the hell we can’t take a picture of this” Im literally the worst person ever 

im still laughing about this they were so mad omg 

buttsdotcom:

I need to lose 30 pounds in today

kalories:

i’ve had tumblr for years and i still don’t know what the fuck an rss feed is

christina-r-a-e:

dinnerpartydan:

That awkward moment when you ran up the stairs and now you’re trying to hide your heavy breathing like it’s no big deal but you’re actually pretty winded and dear god you need to work out.

i was thinking this last night..